December 24 - Christmas Angels

"Christ has no body now but yours." - St. Teresa of Avila

Merry Christmas!  

After listening to today's Advent video from Dynamic Catholic and then reflecting on their message that "People inspire hope", I decided to share a story about a "Christmas Angel" from many years ago that gave me hope. 

Eleven years ago I was in the hospital on Christmas Eve in Springfield, Missouri. I had been newly diagnosed with Chronic Myleoid Leukemia (CML) just two days earlier.  My kids, at my insistence, had gone to Kansas for Christmas. My husband was in a room up the hall getting some much needed rest. My families tradition was to have a big family gathering every Christmas Eve and this would be the first time I wouldn't be there. It was about 8 p.m. and I remember feeling more lonely and afraid than I'd ever felt in my life. After only about 15 minutes of being alone, two young ladies came into my room. One of them approached me and presented me a handmade snowman. It was beautiful in its simplicity. It stood about 8" tall with the body of the snowman made of felt, standing in a miniature terracotta pot. I was told by the young lady that she had lost her father to cancer, and now in his remembrance she visited cancer patients on Christmas Eve. What a wonderful gesture! She didn't stay long. I thanked her for her gift and she left. When she was gone, I looked more closely at the snowman, and there clipped on the back with a clothes pin was a handwritten message on a small sticky note. It said  "Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding. God bless you and keep you. Someone is praying you." Wow - what a gift! 

This stranger gave me hope! This stranger became my Christmas Angel!

 

There's a lot of negative things in today's society, and a lot of people who are going through difficult times. While Christmas is a joyous time, it can be lonely for some, and many, myself included, miss our loved ones who have passed more intensely at Christmas. If it is your first Christmas after losing a loved one or your are experiencing something difficult, like I was, it can be easy to feel down. For those who are going through a difficult time, I pray that you find comfort, peace, and hope.

I will end by sharing Dynamic Catholic's "action" for the day: "Get in the mess. Give hope when it is difficult this Christmas."

 

 

December 8 - Hope

"Rejoice in hope. Be patient in tribulation. Be constant in prayer." - Romans 12:12

Since the season of Advent is about hope, I started thinking about how I could live mindfully, which means focusing on now, while also experiencing hope, which I tend to think of as a desire for something to happen in the future. What I realize, is that hope is about both the present and the future. Today, right now, I hope to experience a quiet night and a feeling of peace. I also hope, for peace and health, along with many other things, for the future. What living mindfully does is help me recognize the feeling of hope. In fact, if you look up the definition of hope, you will find "A feeling of trust" as one of the definitions.

When I reflect on the past year and my journey to be more mindful, I realize how much living mindfully has improved my sense of well being and improved my fear and anxiety. Often, although I'm not sure I was aware of it at the time, that sense of  well being came from hope, especially during the many days and nights where Ed experienced his critical health issues. Sometimes the hope was for the future, that tomorrow would be better than today. Sometimes, the hope was in the present--- from the feeling of trust that tomorrow would be better than today. Hope - - it's a beautiful thing.

During this season of Advent, we are reminded not to live in a place of settling but to live in a place of being awake and aware. It is the truth and expectation that God is working in our life now, in our present moment. It is a promise that what we hope for in his name is obtainable. It is a time to remember that the salvation God promised throughout all of history has already come, and we live in the hope of that salvation. We cannot settle for just the way things are, but must live in the awe and wonder of the memory of God’s promise.

My hope for anyone reading this is that during this Christmas season you find hope...hope in Jesus. And, that through this hope you find "an anchor for your soul" which secures you through the storms of life.

November 27 - Mindful Gift Giving

"It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” — Mother Teresa

 This evening I was Christmas shopping for my five grand kids. In the past, I confess, I have gone a little overboard with presents. I truly enjoy the shopping and trying to find things I think the kids will enjoy. However, this year I have been instructed by my daughter and daughter-n-law to cut down on toys. In fact, they prefer not many, if any toys at all. Since they have reminded me multiple times, I decided to heed their advice. For one gift, I am giving each child a magazine subscription. This will encourage reading and be a gift that lasts all year. My next task was to find that one special gift purchased with each child in mind. I'm happy to say after visiting with parents, the kids, and then shopping the internet. that I found something unique for each grand child. The interesting thing is that I have been more mindful than in past years.  I followed the tips below taken from the article "6 Tips for Mindful Gift Giving".

Mindful giving involves paying attention to:

• What is meaningful for the recipient
• Exploring your whys behind giving the gift
• Reconsidering your preconceived or habitual ways of giving

The above article is excellent and one I highly recommend reading! Gift giving should be a joy and come from the heart.

Days 353 - 359

November 21, 2017 - Happy Thanksgiving

"Thanksgiving isn't just a day, it's a way we can live our lives every day!" - Katrina Mayer

Thanksgiving, which is tomorrow, provides a great time to be mindful of our blessings. My top 5 things I am thankful for today:

• Birthday blessings! Last week was my birthday. I received birthday wishes and gifts from friends, students and family. I felt special ALL day!
• Hearing from an old friend through good old fashioned "snail mail". What a treat to get a "real" letter from a friend, just because she was thinking of me!
• A special gift bag of goodies with creative notes from one of my students. For example, I received an Amazon gift card with a note about what an AMAZing teacher I am. (This was just one of multiple notes.) How wonderful to be appreciated!
• Family blessings! I am forever thankful for the family that God blessed me with!
• Faith! A good friend lost her father last week. It reminded me of the loss of my parents. My faith reminds me that I will see them again some day.

Many blessings and Happy Thanksgiving! 

Days 332 - 352

November 1 - Mindful Spending

The price of  anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.

A topic I've rarely addressed in this blog is that of money. I feel like I'm financially in an okay situation, but deep down I know I could be in a much better place. Not one to like following a budget or deprive myself, I tend to have a recurring habit of trying to earn extra money when things get tight. I've done numerous direct sales adventures over the years, many of which were prompted by my need (or want) for money. (Yes - you can make money in direct sales, although I have yet to make the "big" money.) Many of my direct sales business ventures I've truly enjoyed and they really didn't seem like extra "work". But regardless of my level of enjoyment and extra income, there was one thing I was giving up - TIME! Eventually, because of the time commitment it took to do a good job, I'd quit my business or stay minimally active. 

Today, finding myself a few months before Christmas, I have found myself researching the internet for new "opportunities" and thinking about becoming more active in the few I'm still involved with. Then I asked myself - "If I were more mindful about money, would this be necessary?"

What does it really mean to spend mindfully? I like the definition I found from this blog post:

Mindfully spending your time and money means pausing to consider the impact of each expenditure on you, your life and the lives and environments of those around you.

Do I really do this? Since I can look over my expenditures at different stores and not even remember what I purchased, I'd have to say "No!" In order to spend more mindfully and in a manner that is consistent with my priorities, I am challenging myself to ask the following questions before spending money.

Why am I buying this ...?

Is this something I could live without?

Am I replacing something with this purchase? If not, do I really NEED it?

Can I make it myself?

The bottom line, we need to all remember  - Why before Buy!

 

Days 317-331

October 17 - Quiet Your Mind

"Overthinking will destroy your mood. Breathe and let it go."

I have written before about how living mindfully is sometimes a struggle for me. I have a very busy mind that seems to go constantly. I analyze things (often over analyze), plan ahead, and am barraged by my own thoughts. As an example, I want to lose weight. I've probably read the pros and cons of 90% of the diets out there...and there are a lot of diets to choose from. Working with my counselor, she suggested I quit thinking (something she said she rarely tells her clients) and "let it go and just do". My instructions were that when thinking about having a snack, instead of thinking about how many calories, which is the healthier choice, should I avoid dairy, etc., she suggested to stop - and breathe. Square breathing...(breathe in to the count of four, hold for the count of four, exhale for the count of four, rest for the count of four)... was her recommendation. And guess what? It seems to be working!

A good analogy that I read in an article here, said that when you focus on your thinking, your mind is like an electric fan with thoughts blowing everywhere. When you focus on your breathing  however, thoughts can come and go like clouds across a sky. “You can look at them, realize they are just thoughts, and let them go,” says Victor Davich, author 8-Minute Meditation: Quiet Your Mind, Change Your Life. I found that I was thinking so much about which diet or eating plan was the best, my thoughts were constantly on food. Now I just breathe until my  thoughts are quieted.

This technique could apply to other things that get my mind over thinking. With information at our finger tips now, it is easy to bombard our self, putting our thoughts in constant motion. So again - as been the theme of this blog - stop and be in the moment! Just breathe!

Days 299 - 316

October 1 - Flow

"Grow with your inner flow."

I have been listening to an audio book entitled "The Craving Mind". It has been very interesting to me as the essence of the book is about overcoming addictions and bad habits by being mindful. I have previously posted about mindful eating and some strategies to help with that. For me, this has been an ongoing struggle.

There is a section in the book about flow, which is essentially "being in the zone". We all have experienced flow. When you are so involved in something you look up from what you are doing and wonder where the time has gone, that is flow. Flow, like many things, if taken to far can also be addictive. For example, if someone continually puts them self into a harmful situation because of thrill or rush. Many other elements of flow are similar to meditation, which is a great mindfulness technique. According to the author of "The Craving Mind", the aspects of meditation that are similar to flow are "Concentration focused and grounded in the present moment. Subjective experience of a continuously unfolding 'present' moment. Intrinsic reward."

Practicing mindfulness helps to generate flow experiences directly.Here’s what you experience when you’re in a state of flow:

• You feel at one with the world. 
• You let go of your worries and problems. 
• You’re completely focused.
• You feel very satisfied with what you’re doing. 
• You’re happy, although you don’t really notice it at the time because you’re so engrossed in whatever you’re doing. 

By knowing when you’ve been in flow, you can encourage more opportunities to experience it in the future.

What activities do you engage in where you experience flow? (Examples - reading, exercising, drawing, playing an instrument, etc.) .

Days 288 - 298

September 21 - Now

 "Never bear more than one kind of trouble at a time. Some people bear three--all they have had, all they have now, and all they expect to have."-Edward Hale

 
     The above was today's quote in my daily calendar. It is perfect for this blog and a great reminder as we move into fall -- enjoy life - live mindfully!

Photo by Mike Hoag

Days 284-288

September 17 - Having Patience

 Patience is not the ability to wait, but how you act while you are waiting.

Having patience is something I have struggled with, yet it seems essential to living mindfully. Patience might be the key to a happy life. Since having patience means being able to wait calmly in the face of frustration or adversity, we have many opportunities to practice it. Patience can mean the difference between worry and tranquility. One of my goals for living mindfully is to help reduce worry and frustration, thus the importance of patience.  There is a great article here in Psychology Today on why patience is important and how to practice it. If, like me, you sometimes struggle with impatience, take a few moments to read this article. It will be well worth your time. Remember -

Patience is a Virtue

Days 272-283

September 6 - Waking Up

Wake up every morning with the thought that something wonderful is about to happen!"

I recently read an article in Reader's Digest on mindful living. Something I took away from the article that could add to my mindful living journey was to take a few moments in the morning before getting out of bed to decide on an intention for my day. What a great, mindful way  to start the day! If I ask myself every morning, "What qualities would I like to cultivate today?", then I am beginning my day with a positive intention. Whatever intention comes to mind can be my focus for the day.

Days 255 - 271

August 20 - Enjoy life today!

Enjoy life today, because yesterday is gone and tomorrow is never promised.

This past week a young lady from our community named Loran, only 30 years old, suddenly passed away. While she had some health issues, her death was completely unexpected. Her parents both worked for years at our local middle school, first as teachers and then as counselor and principal. The entire family has given a lot to our community and now the community is mourning their loss. My heart aches for Loran's family. Loran was a kind, strong, and very personable young lady. Because of her illness, Loran had challenges, but she enjoyed life and lived it to her fullest! She will be missed!

For me, as I continue my mindful living journey, the suddenness of one's death is strong reminder of why each  moment, of each day should be cherished! Let us all remember the quote above, "Enjoy life today, because yesterday is gone and tomorrow is never promised."

Rest in peace Loran. God be with her parents and family in their hour of need.

 (Days 237 - 254)

August 3 - Put Down the Camera

Enjoy this MOMENT . . . this moment is your LIFE! 

      The other day I had two of my grand kids, Jaylin and Jace, with me. They were on the tire swing laughing and giggling. They were being silly and having a great time. I was sitting on a nearby swing watching them, and pulled out my camera to take a Snapchat (a video) of them laughing. It was a great moment and I loved hearing their giggles, so I thought I'd share it. When they saw that I had my phone / camera out, they immediately stopped swinging. Jaylin, who is 9, held out her hand and shouted "STOP!" So, I did, and then I started wondering about my constant need to capture and share so much. I love having pictures, especially of my grand kids, so I'm sure I won't ever quit taking pictures. But, in thinking about it from their perspective I wondered how it must feel to constantly have Mema trying to take their picture. Annoying is my best guess! They should be allowed to be silly and laughing without having to worry about how they look and who I was going to share their silliness with.

    In today's world of social media, taking pictures and videos to share the moment has become so
and mindful of the very moment we are trying to capture. Why isn't the moment enough without the need to share? If I can capture a few snapshots of special times with the kids, then I think I should put down my phone and just enjoy being with them.

I pledge to be mindful of my need to constantly take pictures and to share every moment. I can find happiness in observing and being in the moment. While I like to share the joy I'm experiencing and witnessing, I need to remember it is not always necessary, and in fact can be intrusive.

So  my challenge to myself and others is to be mindful of the moments you are photographing. Personally, I don't think it's necessary to give it up altogether, but don't let it overshadow the fun you are having or the fun of those you are photographing.

(Days 222-236)

July 20 - Simple Pleasures

"Simply Enjoy Life and the Great Pleasures That Come With It."

There are so many things to enjoy this time of year, despite the severe heat. 

 

Enjoying simple pleasures is a direct route to mindful living. 

Here are a few things I've been enjoying:

      A couple of young neighbor girls often ride their bikes with training wheels up and down the sidewalk in front of my house. I love watching and listening to them. 

     Fresh produce. I'm very lucky to have a friend who shares her bounty with me!

     The swimming pool. Kids and families laughing and playing together.

     An iced tea.

     Ice cream.
  
     My nightly warm bath.

     Reading a good book.

What are some of your simple pleasures?

(Days 220-222)

     

    

 

Simply enjoy life and the great pleasures that come with it.
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/k/karolinaku347878.html?src=t_pleasures

Simply enjoy life and the great pleasures that come with it.
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/k/karolinaku347878.html?src=t_pleasures

Simply enjoy life and the great pleasures that come with it.
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/k/karolinaku347878.html?src=t_pleasures

Simply enjoy life and the great pleasures that come with it. Karolina Kurkova
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/k/karolinaku347878.html?src=t_pleasures

Simply enjoy life and the great pleasures that come with it. Karolina Kurkova
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/pleasures.html

July 18 - Remember to Live Mindfully

“If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.” ~Amit Ray

As I continue my mindful living journey, I am thankful for how much I have learned about mindful living and how it helps me overcome my anxiety and worry. The past couple of weeks, after feeling somewhat down earlier this summer, have been much more relaxing and enjoyable. Living in the moment, enjoying the summer, playing with the grand kids...focusing on NOW...it really is the key to happiness. After 220 days, I wish I could say mindful living has become second nature to me. While it is easier, I often revert back to planning, worrying and wondering. I wanted to do a quick blog post to remind myself, and anyone reading, to remember these five tips for mindful living:

Breathe!

Focus on what is in front of you.

Tune into what you are doing when you are doing it.

Remember - thoughts are just thoughts.

Take time to simply be.

(Days 205-220)

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July 3, 2017 - Loving Others

"Love demands that I learn how to focus my attention on the needs of those I love." -John Powell

For the past week I have been with my 2-year old grandson, Cade while his mom and dad took a short vacation. His older two siblings spent the time with their other grand parents. Cade was born with Hypolplastic Left  Heart Syndrom (HLHS) so is developmentally behind for a 2-year old. He also has a feeding tube. Needless to say I had some worry about handling the feedings. However, my daughter had confidence in me, and I very much wanted her and her husband to have an opportunity to get away. Cade has made a lot of progress in the last six months! He is walking, talking (both with sign language and verbally), and plays independently and with others. He seems to be quickly catching up. It brought me such great joy to have this one on one time with Cade. 

Why do I bring this up on my mindful living blog? Because, by being attentive to the needs of others, I felt an overwhelming since of love. It's a lot for my daughter and her husband to care for three children, one of which has special needs. So it was nice to get Snapchats and pictures of them enjoying themselves. And the smiles and snuggles I got from Cade over the last week are priceless. I'm grateful to have had this special time with this special little boy.

Now to rest and relax and take care of myself !

Days 185-204

June 14, 2017 - Yoga

"You Create Your Own Calm"

Last week I was really struggling with depression. I don't feel that anything in particular triggered my feelings - they just were what they were. I was feeling a sense of loss. Missing my parents, and continuing to adjust to changes in my home life. This week I decided to take steps towards improving my mental  health. I am striving to do the things I've been blogging about - being mindful, being grateful for my blessings and finding joy in my journey. I used to do yoga on a fairly regular basis and have been out of the practice for a couple of years. I decided returning to yoga would be a good place to start. So Sunday evening I pulled out my mat, set up outside in the evening and did yoga. It felt wonderful! Last night I was feeling very frustrated. Instead of comforting myself with a bowl of ice cream, I pulled out the yoga mat again and did a restorative practice. Tonight I did another 15 minutes. It's amazing how good just a short routine makes me feel!

If you've never practiced yoga I urge you to give it a try. Some of the physical benefits of yoga are:

• Increased flexibility.
• Increased muscle strength and tone.
• Improved respiration, energy and vitality.
• Maintaining a balanced metabolism.
• Weight reduction.

Just as important to me - and maybe more important, are the mental benefits. As stated in Psychology Today, "Yoga increases body awareness, relieves stress, reduces muscle tension, strain, and inflammation, sharpens attention and concentration, and calms and centers the nervous system."

I plan to get back into a more regular yoga routine. If you want to join me, remember it doesn't have to be a long session, even a short restorative yoga session will calm the mind.

 
Days 175-184

June 5, 2017 - Making Memories

"Memories made together last a lifetime."

The last four days I was lucky enough to take a short trip with my three sisters! Sisters are so special...you have memories of your past, your parents, and can dream of the future together. Upon reflection, we were mindful of things that would make our trip enjoyable. And, in full disclosure, there are a few things I still struggle with that caused me unnecessary stress. The main one, was self criticism. I found myself making comparisons to my sisters. Is my outfit as cute as theirs? Does my hair look okay? Of all people that I should be totally comfortable with, it is my sisters. I didn't do this to the extent of ruining the trip, it was just something in reflection of the weekend that was unnecessary, and something I plan to work on. Self-criticism is so pointless!

Now for all that was right! Being together. Enjoying each other's company. Laughing over past memories and crying over lost love ones, mainly our parents. We all do things that remind of us of each other and our parents. One example is our friendliness to others. Our dad never knew a stranger. This is true of us, and it brings us great joy. We spent some time at the Farmer's Market. My older sister bought potatoes from an older gentlemen that reminded her of our dad, one of my younger sisters bough a beautiful bouquet that reminded her of my mom, my youngest sister bought tomatoes which she grew to love because my dad grew such great ones every year. We visited my aunt (our mom's sister) who gave us hand-made bags to take to the Farmer's Market. Our mom was creative and generous in creating crafts, so it was very special that our aunt did this for us. She also made us a home-made dinner complete with apple pie.Yum!

A couple of tips that made our trip enjoyable that others might keep in mind:

*Let go of control. We traveled with no specific plans and yet everything was perfect!

*Don't believe the weatherman! It was supposed to be very stormy the Saturday of our trip, but we walked to the Farmer's Market and downtown any way. It did sprinkle at one point. We stopped, had drinks and listened to some live music. We might not have done this if not for the sprinkles. Then, later, it poured. We popped into a tea shop and had some tea. Again - it was a great place that we might not have spent as much time in had in not been for the weather.

It was a great weekend that we plan to do more of in the future.

Days 168-174

May 30, 2017 - Summer!

"Begin doing what you want to do now."

The past week has been very busy with many things happening. Mostly, these have been things I've been wanting to do.  I have been lucky enough to spend time with all of my grand kids. When in the presence of the kids, I experience such profound joy...it is so easy to be in the moment. Jaylin and Jace came over for a "sleep over". I attended Cade's 2nd birthday party, Ellie's first dance recital, and spent time playing ball with Brody. I also spent time with two different friends. One I hadn't seen for over a year. When you can spend a full day together and it's like you saw each other just yesterday, you know you are lucky in this friendship. I also spent extra time with Ed as he traveled to Columbia, MO with me.

This summer I am not working full time and plan to continue to find time each week to do things that bring me happiness. I love summer and what it brings...ball games, swimming, vacations . . .sunshine!

Happy summer!

Days 157 - 167

May 21 - Flower Gardens

"Stop and smell the roses."

Today I have been busy all day working in the yard and flower beds. My mom and dad were both great gardeners. Living in their house now, I'm trying hard to maintain the perennials so cared for over the years by my parents. The interesting thing is, I've never been much into gardening - flowers or otherwise. But today, I really enjoyed myself! My mom told me once that after her dad passed away was when she began her herb garden. She could immerse herself in the work and she found pleasure in the planting, pruning and fruition of her work. She said she found a sense of peace doing this. That's how I felt today.  I felt a sense of peace and joy as I was working with the flowers. Who knows, maybe I'll turn into a gardener!

It's been a year this week since my mom passed away. My heart is heavy at times with the sense of loss. But today, I was "happy in the moment".  And you know what? I think that would make Mom and Dad happy too! A good mindfulness tip to remember: 

 "Wherever you are, be all there!"

One of my roses.

Days  143-156

May 8 - Nature

"Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished."

A few weeks ago I noticed a bird's nest in our yellow rose bush. I every so gently pulled down the branch and sure enough confirmed there were eggs inside of the nest. Over the weekend I noticed the baby birds. This evening for the first time I noticed their little heads and beaks popping out of the nest as the mamma bird flew in to feed them. As I was observing this, I started thinking about birds and what I can learn from them in my mindful living journey. It's been nice enough to sleep with the windows open lately, and I enjoy waking to the birds singing. So what can we learn from birds?

1) Be confident - Trust yourself and be confident to try new and different things.

 “A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch, but on her own wings.” – Anonymous

2) Spread your wings - until you do, you have no idea how far you can fly.

3)  Flock together - keep friends and family close.

4) Start your day with a sense of joy. The birds greet the beginning of a new day with a chorus of sounds. They seem elated with the dawning of a new day.

Be mindful of nature and the beauty it provides us!

(Days 139-143)

May 3 - Phone Distractions

"Distraction wastes our energy, concentration restores it." -Sharon Salzberg

My phone continues to be a distraction from my mindful living. Early on when I started this blog, I talked about how it was hard for me to eat mindfully, because I often checked Facebook or email on my phone. It amazes me how often I feel the need to check my phone. Of course there are many benefits from having a phone, but how many times do we let it get in our way of having a focused conversation, an uninterrupted dinner, or getting work done without interruptions. Does anyone else struggle with this? An article called "We Need a Break From out Phone" goes into a lot more detail about problems created from being tethered to our phones. The article goes on to give some great suggestions for managing your cell phone usage. Something as simple as taking a walk and leaving your phone at home or setting it to "do not disturb" during certain time periods.I think a good goal for myself and all of us would be to evaluate if our phones are keeping us from living mindfully.

 

Days 132-138

April 27, 2017

“If you must look back, do so forgivingly. If you must look forward, do so prayerfully. However, the wisest thing you can do is be present in the present... gratefully.” - Maya Angelou

On the last Thursday of every month the Coffey County Cancer Support Group holds their monthly meeting. This is a wonderful group offering both financial and emotional support to those suffering from cancer as well as their caregivers. I attend this meeting as much as I can. When there, I leave with a mixture of emotions. Joy for those that have won their battles with cancer, heartache for those that are on hospice (and their loved ones), and respect and admiration for the courage shown by those currently battling this horrible disease. Tonight there was sad news as we learned about members of our group that were now on hospice and of other members in our community that were continuing their fight with cancer. Tonight, more than ever, I am reminded of the importance of living mindfully and being grateful for my blessings.

Always remember, my friends - live and enjoy the moment, for tomorrow isn't guaranteed.  Please pray for those suffering from cancer and their loved ones.

 

(Days 129-131)

April 24, 2017 - Resistance

“Resistance is a slayer of dreams.” - Matthew Kelly

 I've gotten away from posting mindful living tips and decided to refocus. Some may be similar to earlier posts, but I think they are important for my mindful living journey (and yours if you are following along). A few things to work on so we can be more mindful:

1. Resist Urges. Watch your urges. Sit there and watch the urge rise and fall, until it is gone, without acting on it. Resist your urge to check email or social media, to eat something sweet or fried, to drink alcohol, to watch TV, to be distracted, to procrastinate. These urges will come and go, and you don’t have to act on them.
2. Resist Ideals. We all have ideals, all the time. We have an ideal that our day will go perfectly, that people will be kind and respectful to us, that we will be perfect, that we’ll never fail. Of course, we know from experience that those ideals are not real, that they don’t come true, that they aren’t realistic. But we still have them, and they cause our stress and fears and grief over something/someone we’ve lost. By letting go of ideals, we can let go of some of our frustrations.
3. Watch Your Resistance. When you try to do something uncomfortable, or try to give up something you like or are used to, you’ll find resistance. Matthew Kelly, a speaker with Dynamic Catholic, says "Resistance is that sluggish feeling that stops us from doing the things that we know are good for us. It’s that sense that, “I don’t want to do that,” even though we know it’s the thing we should do."  Be mindful of your resistance. Learn to recognize it and be curious about it so you can conquer it. 

These are all things that I plan to work on this week!

(Days 121-128)

April 16 - Happy Easter!

"The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter."

Days 103-113, April 3 - 10

"Always be a work in progress."

While I haven't been as consistent at doing yoga recently as I have in the past, it is a practice that when I do regularly I find very beneficial for my both my mental and physical well being. Physically yoga helps improve flexibility, balance and posture. It increase blood flood and has been shown to boost  immunity. It also increases  muscle strength and helps me get toned. Mentally, yoga helps me relax and reduces my anxiety. It also makes me more self-aware. If I bring mindfulness to my yoga practice, I will get even greater benefits out of my yoga practice.

 Yesterday I had the opportunity to yoga with some friends outside at someone's place in the country. Although windy, it was a beautiful evening. It was relaxing and enjoyable. A reminder for me of why I need to go back to practicing yoga regularly.

Days 97 - 102 / March 30 - April 3

"Today, fill your life with a cup of sunshine, love, and laughter."

After several rainy days it was a beautiful afternoon with the sun shining! I was mindful of the warmth of the sun, the budding of the trees, and the blooming flowers. There is a spot outside on my patio that catches the afternoon sun. When my mom lived here before her passing, I would often come by in late afternoon or early evening and see her sitting on a bench enjoying the afternoon sun. It felt good to sit in that spot and embrace her memory.

Mom and Dad always treasured the simple pleasures in life - like sitting in the sun or watching the sunset. Remembering my mom and dad in ordinary moments like this helps me to turn my heartache into happiness. For it is my daily reminder of the love I was blessed with throughout my life.

Days 94-96, March 27-29 - Enjoying the Little Things

"Happiness often comes from noticing and enjoying the little things in life ."

Last Saturday I went to the mall with my 4-year old granddaughter Ellie.  When I parked, I told Ellie we needed to pay attention, because I often lose my car in the parking lot. As we were walking in, she spotted an impression of a leaf in the concrete. She was so excited about this find as a marker for where our car was. I wasn't sure it'd be enough to help me remember where the car was, but it was fun watching how much joy she experienced over this discovery. In fact, she found a second leaf impression that was equally as fascinating to her. I wonder how many adults walked that same path Saturday and if any noticed the leaf. 

 Mindfulness is not simply being aware of what is happening and what is around us. It is about how we relate to what is happening, and how we experience the things we observe. How wonderful it would be if adults found excitement in such a simple thing as a leaf impression in the concrete!

Days 83-93, March 17-26

“God wants you to be fully aware of every breath of air you take, every bite of food, every smile from a baby, every word you read, every song you hear, every kiss on the lips. God loves ordinary things.”-Matthew Kelly

As I mentioned in my last post, I reviewed my previous posts so I could focus on what is working on my mindful living journey. The quote above was from one of the daily videos I am receiving from Dynamic Catholic throughout lent. This really spoke to me and confirms what I know, although it's not what I always do. God wants us to be mindful! He wants us to enjoy and appreciate life. To watch this video, click here.  His two suggestions at the end of the video reiterate what is important. Give the people you are with 100% of your attention. Quit multi-tasking. That, along with focusing daily on what I am grateful for, will be my goals for the upcoming week. Will you join me?

Dyas 79-82, March 13 - 16

"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new." -Socrates

 Today at work I asked my assistant what she thought of an idea I had. Her tone didn't seem very enthusiastic even though she said she thought it was a good idea. So I inquired further, and her response was something like this: I think it's a good idea, but so are several others you have had today. You need to get the squirrel out of your brain and focus and follow through on something.  I was not at all offended by her directness.  In fact, I appreciated it and the fact that she felt comfortable enough to share her thoughts. And she was absolutely right! I find being mindful SO healthy and refreshing when I practice it. But I am constantly amazed at how much of a struggle it is for me. When I read the Socrates quote above, I wondered to myself - HOW?  How do I quit fighting the old? According to an article I read in Psychology Today, I, and anyone trying to  focus, should do the following:

 Manage what you focus on. Pay attention to your attention, and stop yourself from getting on the wrong train of thought early, before it takes over. This is the opposite of being mindless: it's being mindful.

This is what I have been trying to do for 82 days now. I find some days are easier than others. I thought I might try some things from The Habit Change worksheet .   
I am going to write out a  plan and identify my triggers. I also think I'm trying to make too many changes at once. I have the next week off, so I thought I'd read back over my blog and identify what's worked in my mindful living journal, and what seems to be going on when I have struggles. Then I'll write down my plan. So "tune in" next week to see what my plan is!

Days 69-78, March 4- 12 - Mindful of My Blessings

Being mindful of your blessings keeps your heart humble.

I fell off the radar for several days. Last week my uncles, Jim and Ron, began remodeling our bathroom to make it handicapped accessible. I don't feel very productive when my house is in chaos. I have the attitude that things can wait until the remodel is done. Despite a lot of dust and mess and getting very  little accomplished, it was a very good week. What I enjoyed the most about it was having evening meals with my uncles and Ed. I haven't had much opportunity in recent years to visit with my uncles. Every day when I cam home from work and I would see all  they had accomplished and how hard they worked, I was overcome with gratitude for their generosity, because they are not charging me any labor for this project. And it is a huge project! The bathroom was completely gutted. They are not only doing the labor, they have planned the entire project. And, I appreciate my aunts input in the planning and being supportive of them being gone from home.

I don't know why Ed had to lose his legs. I don't know why we aren't living the "golden years" we planned. What I do know, is that God has put some wonderful people on this earth and provided us with many blessings. That is what I choose to be mindful of!

Days 65-68, Feb. 28 - 3/3 -- DISTRACTIONS

"Distractions waste our energy, concentration restores it." - Sharon Salzberg

Something that I have become more aware of since beginning my mindful living journey is how easily distracted I am. Some of my friends and family may not be surprised by this. But, for me, it's such an innate part of who I am that it is 'normal' and after all of these years a light bulb just went on and I'm thinking..."should it really be this hard to stay focused and be mindful?".  I have suddenly recognized how much energy I put into to being distracted. It's like there's a squirrel in my brain constantly distracting me.  Here's an example from this week...

I arrive home from work with plans to go exercise. I go into the bedroom to change into workout clothes, and then I decide I've got a few minutes so I'll lay out my clothes for tomorrow, at which point I get into my closet and realize, as I look at my shoes all over the floor, that I never did find my shoe inserts, and I should really be wearing them so I go to my dresser thinking that's where I'd start looking when I see my night gown there, and I decide I  should put that in the bathroom since Ed usually goes to bed before me and besides that's where I normally keep it.  I take it to the bathroom and remember that the bathroom remodel starts next week and yep - a quick look at the time on my phone shows me I have time to empty one drawer into the empty tub sitting there, which I do, (after a quick look at Facebook). I then take the tub to the upstairs spare bedroom where I'm storing things. Then, on the way out of that room I look into where the kids play and realize they left a few things out last time they were here. Company's coming so I pick up a few of those things on my way by and then back down the stairs I go only to realize I better get changed to go exercise . .   You get the picture! Seriously!!  This is how my brain works sometimes...chasing squirrels! 

So what's a girl to do? Here's a few tips I've found through my research. Some I'm working on already (like being more mindful) and others I haven't tried yet (meditation).

• Practice mindfulness
• Slow down
• Eliminate clutter
• Shut off electronic notifications
• Train your brain to stay focused -- stop yourself when you catch yourself being distracted
• Quit trying to multi-task
• Learn to mediate

Is anyone else easily distracted? What do you do to stay mindful?